A divorce is often a very painful experience. It is difficult to accept that everything you fought for – everything that was once so good and thrilling, perfect and pure – has come to an end. People often grieve over the loss of a marriage and that is perfectly normal. Many will have a hard time adjusting to the overwhelming feelings that you go through during a divorce, but with the right support system to help you through it, you can be happy and feel ‘normal’ again in time.
Here are some ways to help you handle the transition…
The first thing you need to do is acknowledge your feelings. You have to be honest and sincere with yourself in order get through the disappointment, pain and hurt. The feelings that you have are true and valid, and you should not wallow in self-pity.
As you begin to take care of yourself on the inside, mentally and emotionally, you should also take care of yourself on the outside. Get enough rest and sleep to help reduce stress and anxiety. Exercise is an excellent way to not only burn off stress and anxiety but also keep yourself healthy. People who exercise regularly often have higher levels of self-esteem than those who don’t. If you don’t have an exercise plan yet, this would be the best time to include it in your daily plans of activity. Exercising does not only helps you increase your physical health, but studies show that people who exercise regularly are less depressed and are happier than those who don’t. Having your own exercise routine will help you greatly in accepting and overcoming the feelings of grief.
Often times it is best to call for professional help with divorce to get all the help you need. Although it is advisable to share your feelings with friends and family, a professional counsellor can give you new insights and is trained and educated in ways to specifically help you get through this difficult time. Sharing your feelings with friends and family is great, but sometimes you just don’t want to open up to everyone that way and it is more comfortable to be able to freely discuss your feelings with a professional counsellor instead. Your therapist will listen to every detail of the problem and make helpful suggestions to speed you along the road to recovery.
Remember that you are not alone. There are others who have been through what you going through, often with very similar experiences and complications. It is beneficial to talk with others who are also going through the same thing you are right now. Joining a support group will create connections with other people who are working their way through the grieving and eventually healing processes associated with a divorce. You will realize that not one person has gone through a divorce without experiencing feelings of grief. Although it takes time for wounds to close and heal, everyone will recover; it is just a matter of time. Listening to other people’s experiences and stories will widen your understanding of the problem and is often one of the best ways to help you get through the hardship of divorce. Meeting new people will not only help you discover more about but you will also generate new and supportive friends, which is always a good thing.